Follow your True North

Follow your True North

This week I am participating in the True North Leadership Summit birthed by my dear friend and colleague, Teresa Howes. Many months ago when I was crying in a panic about my life, freaking out that I was going through menopause and wouldn’t be able to have children, Teresa held me and told me that my feelings were OK. The fear and hope I was experiencing were completely OK and she reminded me that feeling (and expressing feelings) indicated my True North. She told me I had a compass and it was pointing strongly toward my desire to be a mother. I feel honored and profound joy to see her own dreams come to fruition. She is an inspiration to me because of her courage to name her dreams and share them to uplift women. (more…)

What living and leading from pleasure looks like

What living and leading from pleasure looks like

Every week for almost a year I’ve sat down and birthed an article. I never really plan what I’m going to write and have faith that inspiration will manifest a topic for me. That has been true up until the past few weeks. I’ve been stretching. It’s not that I’m not inspired. I’m inspired daily by something or other. It’s that I haven’t been inspired to write. And I love writing. Usually.

I’ve been preaching to anyone who is willing to listen (and those who aren’t – I’m from New York City, I don’t always ask permission) how amazing it is to live and lead from Radical Pleasure™. I’ve been preaching that the days of doing from duty, obligation, and martyrdom are over. There’s a new sheriff in town. There’s a new town. In this town, you are tapped into your desires, wishes, needs, and wants. Here, you ask yourself “what makes me feel good?”, not “what can I do to make this pain go away?” In this town, you give to yourself first so you can give to others from fullness. Here, you are courageous and vulnerable and are accepted for exactly you. I love this town! (more…)

The Pleasure Principle: Start the crusade

 

Well, I learned something new again this week. Apparently there are folks who are afraid of PLEASURE. They’re triggered by the word itself and want to run in the opposite direction. I recently launched my comprehensive program to work with conscious women and men to end self-violence and create more pleasure in their lives. I sent details of the program to several people – clients, trusted friends, and entrepreneurs – and received mixed feedback. What struck me was how seeing the word PLEASURE even in the title made people squirmy. (more…)

Reserve your intimacy for special people

Reserve your intimacy for special people

A lot of people I know have been feeling discouraged, unloved, unlovable, undesirable, and downright hopeless. They tell me they don’t understand why they keep meeting people who they have a mega spark with that then fizzles out mega quick. In the first few meetings, they talk about intense sexual and physical chemistry and how they have a ton in common. They initially feel heard and uplifted. All of a sudden, they reach “partner” status. Then they get the rug pulled out from under them and are either ghosted or told to slow down. They wonder what happened? I’ll tell you what’s happening. (more…)

Unexpected empowerment: Step into fear

Unexpected empowerment: Step into fear

Step into fear. Do it intentionally without thinking about it. Once you start to think, you’ll talk yourself out of it. Here’s a story about walking toward fear and the unexpected empowerment I received. Welcome to my world. I am not bequeathed with special skills that allowed me to do what I did and become what I became. This is your story too. (more…)

The Ultimate Guide to Having a Kick Ass Relationship

The Ultimate Guide to Having a Kick Ass Relationship

This is the post you’ll want to bookmark, print, & hang on your mirror where you can see it every single day.

Friends, I’m a researcher and philosopher by nature.  I get off on asking questions and stirring up discussion.  The latest inquiry – and one that goes perfectly with my way of being – has been:

What are the elements to having a kick ass relationship?

Honestly, in a world where divorce has tipped toward the norm and breakups are happening left and right (something about Saturn or Venus in retrograde), it’s a mega challenge not to feel hopeless.  A lot of times couples seek help when it’s the last straw and they’re either ridiculously motivated to change or they’re seeking permission to be out.  Unfortunately, I’ve experienced as a therapist mostly the latter. I’m all for hearing about true-to-life struggles of being in a relationship but I also need some light & stories of triumph – not only for me, but for my clients.  When couples are seeking an exit strategy, counseling becomes mediation or divorce therapy. There are a lot of therapists out there who serve as divorce therapists. I’m not one of them.

I’m an intimacy coach – I bring you closer together if and only if you have a burning desire to BE together. (more…)